2 days till EUROPE

Oh man, can you believe it? In 2 days I will be on my way to ITALY! I never thought that the day would come, and here it is, and it is making me so excited. At the same time though, I am sad. I am scared to leave this zone of comfort that is my home, and the wonderful friends that I have in each member of my family. I am going to miss them all like crazy. What is harder for me though, is that I feel like these next three days before I leave are my last of the summer, and the last of the next 3 years with my parents, being here in this home, in this City, in this comfort. I have been nastalgic all day! I woke up this morning feeling sadness at having to leave quickly when my mom had made everyone a nice waffle breakfast, and my siblings were around to help mom go through some things... I know it will be one of the last times before they leave that I will be around to help them go through things, or be all together as a family, and in ways it really breaks my heart. Change has never been something that I am good at dealing with.

Another thing I was thinking about tonight was the concept of LOVE. And how do I feel love?? How do you know if you are in love?? and how do you know that someone can be your forever? These have all been questions on my mind for the last few weeks. We watched the movie "Dan in real life" tonight, and it made me really think about LOVE. The main character in that show has a wife who past away 4 years before the scenes you see in the movie. He has three daughters, and they are all at a family cabin for a week or so. He (on a whim) meets this wonderful and beautiful girl, who actually ends up dating his brother. The story just basically is two sides of Love. One of the sides is the enduring kind of love, where the other person is just your best friend in the world. This person would do anything for you, and would always put you above themselves. This is the kind of lasting love that can withstand pain and hardship. The other kind of love is the more 'romantic' kind of love where each moment, word, and experience with that person is like time consists of just you and them, and you never want it to end. This is exciting love, passionate love, and love that keeps you wanting more. Both of these love's together make a sort of 'ideal' love, the kind of thing that I hope someday to find.

Basically, after watching this movie and a few others that always tug at my heartstrings because of their commentaries on love, made me realize, I am getting ready for that kind of thing. I never was before because I always thought, "you know, there is more out there for me than just school and marriage". I always have wanted to see the world, experience things, be active, and just enjoy. I am getting that opportunity this summer, and I hope it will be everything I ever imagined it to be. But when all is said and done after this summer, I want to have the courage and ability to find this kind of unconditional, undeniable love. I have faith that it will be in my cards to be married one day, and I do hope that that part of it all is at least a few years away, but I believe that after the experiences of the summer, I am going to want to seriously consider what I believe love to be, and what kind of person will embody a man that I will love.

So, I have come full circle. Italy, England, and France are going to rule my world and give me some of the most sought after experiences I have ever hoped for. I will learn from these countries, people, and artists lessons that I could not learn anywhere else. And then I will move on to learning so much about the world of missionary work, and so much more about my Savior and Father in Heaven. I am so excited for this opportunity to finally give back to my parents a little bit of the service that they have given me over the past (almost) 21 years.

When I write next I will be in a foreign land! But I promise to post things, and pictures, and keep ya'll updated.

Chao!

(I wrote that on sunday) :)